How are you not seeing the red flags? There are so many red flags! Why haven’t you told your parents about any of these red flags? Did nobody prepare you for these kinds of red flags? Or what the red flags are warning you about? Are you stupid? Or just in disbelief? Are you shocked that male teachers have the capacity to be inappropriate? Have there not been any stories yet about inappropriate teachers? Are you confused that all of a sudden boys are paying a modicum of attention to you and maybe this also means teachers which is creepy but somehow you think this may be normal? Do you think this is what all those pretty, popular girls have been dealing with all this time but since you’ve never heard them complain about it that it must be normal and okay? Why would you think that is normal and okay? Do you think this is just what girls go through when they get boobs and get their braces off? Do you think this is your fault and you’re embarrassed and ashamed and this is why you don’t want to tell your parents about it?
1. It is not okay for a male teacher to stop you after class, alone, and then ask you if your dress is made of spandex or lycra, when you are wearing the same dress as every other girl in your grade. It is okay that he said he is asking because it is against the dress code to wear spandex. But everyone knows that rule means “no bike shorts to class”. And yeah, this dress is probably more meant for a school dance but all the girls on 90210 are wearing them and Express is selling them and all the girls are wearing them with flats to school. Now you feel really uncomfortable and you are scared. Not to wear the dress again but to wear the dress again in his class.
2. It is not okay for the teacher who asked you about the material in your dress to then ask you and a specifically selected group of girls to come early to his classroom so he can film you. For a video he says is for his nephew who is coming to town. And it is not okay for him to direct what you all are saying into the camera, like waving one by one and saying your name and things you like to do that are fun. And it is not okay for him to invite you, along with this specifically selected group of girls, to an out-of-town waterpark that he will be going to with his family and his nephew. Because he says he wants his nephew to have a fun time. And it is definitely not okay for him to call you at your home and get upset that you are not going to the waterpark, even though you already told him in class that you would not be going to the waterpark.
3. The following year, when you have already forgotten all the nonsense about the dress and the waterpark, it is also not okay for another teacher to say to you in class, when you have raised your hand and mentioned that you don’t understand the assignment, “Don’t worry about it. Just sit there and look pretty.”